Fear or Faith
There is no fear in love because
perfect love casts out fear.
1 John 4:18
Returning
So much has happened since my return from Cambodia last November. The transition home was harder than I could have imagined. How do you get back to "normal life" knowing what you know and seeing what you have seen? How do you release your emotions and allow yourself to move about your life with joy? How do you not feel guilty? I found the key to the transition home was to simply continue to do what God put in my heart to do. Tell the story of the kids.. And so I have... To just about anyone who will give me the time and would listen. The ladies at the sandwich shop, the nurse at the hospital who took care of my husband during a recent stay, my co workers, family, friends. The story has become a part of who I am. I have given my heart to it. The love God has put in my heart for the children compels me to speak without fear.
From the moment I said goodbye to the kids, I knew I would have to return if for no other reason than to see them and let them know there are people who love them and who are fighting for them. The kids need to know that they are not forgettable because they are not! i see their faces in my prayers and thoughts of them are never far off. They are precious and important. Who doesn't need to know that?
So here I am on a plane bound for Bangkok once again. It is sooner than I thought I would be returning but the timing was right to go and so once again, my sweet husband put me on a plane almost twenty four hours ago, kissed me goodbye and said his last prayers over me. I am incredibly proud of him because it is never easy being the one left at home let alone putting your wife of over 27 years on a plane headed to a foreign country by herself because she wants to rescue children. The truth is his love for the kids and for the work that is being done there overcomes any apprehensions he may have. He is choosing love.
Before I left, I got a text from my mom. It said, " We are nervous but we are proud! " it blessed my heart because I realize no matter how old I am, I am still their kid and the fact that they are willing to step beyond their own fear out of a greater love for this mission is pretty awesome.
You see, perfect love casts out fear. I think this is what it boils down to in everything. We get to choose love or fear! Love compels us to give, fear compels us to withdraw and hold back. We choose between the two everyday. Think about it. What fears compel you today and what would happen if you were able to choose love instead. Well I am not sure what that looks like in your life but in mine it looks like one more airplane ride across the globe.
Love from the road,
Julie
